humantooth's postnormal cyberpunkjournal

NSFW

Version 1.7 All Dogs Go to Heaven

/now.

Day 1

The entire composition of this screenshot- the " .mp3 (Re-upload)", the stats, the thumbnail, it's perfect ⅋ peak internet and it would seem 100,000 other folks agree, since by the next day, when it had graced my desktop again, the viewcount had jumped from 2.9 million views up to 3 million*

Day 2

Alternative theories: 10,000 people watched the video 10 times in a row. 1,000 people watch 100 times in a row. 100 people watch 1,000 times. I did the math and its possible, since it would only (only) take 13 hours.

Some of them left comments

Another video appears. Equally weighted in its premise and absurdity, created at the same time.

Does the elephant make it better? or is it the Beethoven? is there a functional difference between what type of media you want to pair with your absurd scenario? or what the subject matter for absurdity is?

I'm stupid enough to ask What the hell was going on 6 years ago??
Then I remembered. (A-hyuk!)

I would have left it at that, but I was going to send that first screenshot to a friend, and thought I should actually watch the video. The suggestions that come up when typing out the video title is like lifting up the rock on the modern human condition. I dont want to know what's happening. It was then I wanted to find the wario thumbnail and...

(CLICK HERE)

Turns out this rabbit hole bottoms out at the top of a whole other iceberg and there's been this on-going trend, for years, of Wario dying soundscapes, some with animations, most are static images, a multiverse of all possible deaths, usually while eating, specifically oreos, made by different people across time and place who might never meet, and I think that's demented and beautiful.

Day 3

Today I come across this, while sourcing screen shots for this very post I am writing. The implications are staggering. The contributing creators, the person collecting videos for the playlist.

Is it real? Is it genuinely 3.4K Wario dies variations? If it's not and becomes a list of cryptoscam livestreams sandwiched in between Wario-dies-while videos, who is the target for the scam? Who is the scammer that thought to target them? I don't want out what's happening. but this time in a different way. Like wario deaths, like schrödinger's cats, I want to live in a world of all possible answers existing.

*3.2 million at the time of this writing

New updates to the off-shore Library!
Farfalle e Bastardi
Bastards & Butterflies

BASATARDI
by Massimo Mattioli
I spent an afternoon translating this comic from Italian because I had to know what it said*.
Originally released in
Frigidaire (1981)
Butterflies
by Samanta Schweblin
Read this extremely short story on the bus back from LA and it appropriately crushed me.
Originally released in
Mouthful of Birds (2019)

*Possibly the first english translation since it was published 45 years ago?

so I swear Im still alive

1. January 2026
The beginning of the year was flush with stuff and part of (the entire) reason I broke my monthly update streak was because I got stuck making another super elaborate update using Decker. Problem is after I finally finished it I realized how fucking boring it was. But if you're frankly obsessed with me, or stalking someone adjacent to me and need to see if they are mentioned, I will still offer you my whereabouts during the year's first month:

run jan26.deck

finally got me one of those 99ranch trader joe style tote bags from my sister-in-law along with a trove of Chinese versioned American junk foods (think: peach tea oreos)

Februārea!
Highlight of feb was easily the California Pen Show. My first pen show and second stationery-centric exhibitor event, and certainly not the last. Its like walking into the internet and giving yourself an excuse to buy ridic shit rapid fire

I remember giving some girl my pencil bracelet after she complimented it. High summer camp antics.
I met a $2,000 pen, on sale for only $980. low-key worth it, given that its at the center of an equation where the person that makes it and the person that buys it spend more time and money than anyone ever should on a pen. The technique is called urishi 1, 2, 3.
-> Crazier than the price is the fact that they let me pick it up and write with it before they told me how much it cost. It was like a stranger asking you to hold their baby. I could be some kind of maniac! Why do you trust me?

x

LINK.DUMP #027 - In-browser delights featuring free international tv channels, pixel blitzers, psychedelic 70s comix, and one helluva house tour.

The end of the year was fine. There's not many specific events that leap to mind, but I remember enjoying myself. Went to the airport a half dozen times, picking folks up and dropping them off. Didn't go anywhere myself. Getting on in my older years I've become pretty self satisfied in a way that might seem alarming to my younger self. Every now and then I wonder if I should feel guilty about how content I am, but that feels like a silly thing to probe. I don't go out much is what I'm trying to say but it's very much by choice. Even when I do try to make plans, it feels delightful to break them and give in to doing what I really want. I think what I used to believe is that for a life well lived you needed to be able to count a lot of things, exciting memories and experiences. well I have those and turns out you dont need to endlessly add to that list, or at least not feel compelled to force new items. That's what I learned this year? Maybe?

One of my many airport trips was to bring my neighbor/ex/doggy-baby-daddy to say goodbye to and then attend services for his brother, who was rapidly deteriorating from and eventually died of pancreatic cancer. Rough stuff. When he got back the first time, after his brother had passed, he showed me a picture of his mom hands, cradling the hand of her oldest son during his last moment on the planet. He wanted me to paint it for her as a Christmas present. It was a bit tricky, trying to capture the likeness of hands. Drawing hands are hard enough but getting them to resemble known hands is a lot tougher. I didn't get a picture of it once it was all done, set and framed, but I do have a pic I sent when I was at the horizon of good enough to give up and stay safe, or keep going and potentially ruin it. From what I remember I didn't do too much after this. Of course she loved it and cried, so thats what matters most.

I also did a set of paintings for my immediate family for Xmas. Once we were done with presents, I pulled out five tiny gift bags, each containing a tiny 2.5" square painting of one of my family members. I had everyone pick a bag at random and then open them at the same time. They were pretty jazzed and the fun of it all trumped the necessity of accuracy or the paintings being that good. Despite how small they were, or precisely so, I bit off more than I could chew by trying to make tiny accurate paintings in watercolor on tiny novelty low-quality canvasses, although grounding them first a few times did help. I didn't get pics of the whole set, but here's the one I pulled of my pops.

Anyway, sorry this month's monthly update's late, they are always late, and saying sorry is an obstinate gesture because I know no one out there has any stakes in me updating this website. Most of the time and fun in making these is in drumming up graphics and trying to execute something new under the hood each time. I aim to always learn a new code trick, usually something small you won't really see, like a new-to-me CSS function or HTML tag. Like, did you know about the <details> and <summary> tags? or even box-sizing attribute? Anyway, I'm running away with myself. My point was supposed to be: I put together a page with the whole year in chronological order. This year I made it all at once (today) whereas usually I add to while the year is on-going, see 2023.html, 2024.html in my Archive, along with other neat stuff I've forgotten about.

Pictured above: 2025's filled out Hibino on top of the freshie for 2026

Currently Reading
Usually when I do my monthly updates I'll throw in a few words about my recent reads, but with so much going on the last month I plum forgot. But my current livre du mois, Running the Light by Sam Tallent is good enough to get its own island.
The plot follows a washed-up comedian on a tour through no-name venues in forgettable towns across forgettable states. Having been a waitress at a comedy club for a few years, I can attest, the misery and hubris of the main character are accurate.
It's written by a comedian I never heard of; the foreward, by another comedian I've never heard of, begins with how the book has no business being as good as it is, expecting it to be a lark, a little side-project from his friend, not an actually good piece of writing. And he's right. It's hella good. The writing is fun, passingly introspective with the kind of blasé horniness of henry miller on a scumbag adventure.
Its one of those books, where if you enjoy reading it, what's going to happen stops mattering. I don't need to worry about character's motivations being realistic or threads being tied. So to have a plot that is engaging and always escalating, a little like that movie where Michael Douglas has a bad day, is a plus. Strong vocabulary too, I would challenge you to find another author using the word "sorghum" on the same page a man with his face melted off in a propane tank explosion does cocaine off the owner's manual of his truck while Pantera plays.
Often I find myself wondering if the author could write something as good if it wasn't about comedy. I would have to think yes, but something about it as a first novel also feels like its giving it all that he has. and other subject matter would suffer from the lack of direct authentic experience? Like when watching stand-up you wonder how much of this really happened, but in the opposite direction. With a comedian on stage you want to buy everything at face value until something becomes too bombastic, but here its like you don't want any of it to be true, but have a creeping suspicion a lot of it might be a first-hand testimonial.
A lot of you might not know this but I used to be a waitress at a comedy club. I usually only mention it in connection with the shooting that took place one night I was working, but its largely the reason why the wretchedness that enshrouds the stand up comedy industry is a special interest of mine. I was real keen on this show I would watch on one of the English language channels in Taiwan called I'm Dying Up Here. Y'all ever catch that?

Click here to hear me bitch about book's I didn't like

On the flipside is Louis CK's debut novel Ingram. A comedian I love and admire (you could not pay me to care about him jerking himself off in front of women) and couldn't wait to read. Boy did that book stink. Right from the first page. The writing is trash! Sad! Here's the first half of the starting sentence of the first four paragraphs:
"When I was a small and new boy..."
"I liked watching the animals walk around..."
"I walked up that road only one time..."
"I scrambled along the side of that hard gray road..."
It's trying to be something, and I get that, but you could at least tell the story with interesting sentences. It's written in a kind of Southern voice, which is incredibly hard to pull off. It's the same reason why I couldn't bring myself to start Marky Zee Danielewski (of House of Leaves fame)'s new book Tom's Crossing, which does use dynamic sentence structure but injects too much twang to feel natural:

"Lindsey probably would’ve kept on kickin too, and achieved some terrible damage upon that helpless and bewildered youth, if none other than Tom Gatestone hisself hadn’t passed by right then. Not that Tom did much except stop in a riot of laughter, which is how Tom often found hisself, couldn’t help hisself, could laugh about pretty much everythin, includin when the moment came for him to die.
Tom’s big ears went bright red, and he howled hisself so hard, he got fast to coughin, gaggin some, enuf to get him diggin loose the leaf at his gum, because it was either that or cease breathin."

Please don't. The whole book is like this and its well over a thousand fucking pages.
Another book I read back in October and quickly enjoyed was Walking Practice by Dolki Min. Its a korean sci-fi story about an alien trapped in Seoul that needs to take on the form of humans (and eat them) in order to survive and is having a tough time managing stairs. Its quick and fun and silly and takes advantage of typography to tell the story. Whenever the main character returns to their home and transforms back to their original form the words expand and loosen along with the alien's form and skin. That's fun!
The book is a meditation of on what its like to fake it to fit in, I thought it was a good commentary on transness and performing gender, but others have likened it to being another human while neurodivergent. Either way, I like that there's more than interpretation, and the message isn't ham-fisted. What is explicit is the violence, which I like, and the heavy-handed sex scenes, which are asian. Its a short book, but I think you get some of both per chapter, maybe even a death at the same rate.
Walking Practice is punctuated with cool illustrations, also drawn by the author. If you're someone that doodles, you can immediately tell that they were fun to make. If you've read Walking Practice, or are a rare kind of literary poser (thinking of that one roomate I had that had "WAR IS PEACE, FREEDOM IS SLAVERY, IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH" tattooed on his forearm, despite never reading 1984), and you have a cricut handy, I've made a shirt design you can spend an afternoon weeding that I've stuck on my cricut projects page.

My top (and bottom) stationery pics for 2025:
.∘✶⋆stationeryspecific.substack.com⋆✶∘.

sorry but if you don't love this calendar, then idk what to tell you. At the top of the month I noticed that the pomegranate tree in the backyard was ripe and ready for the picking, but it wasn't until I found a pomegranate juicer at Marshalls for $7.99 that i would act, snip-snipping at the tree's branches with a big black pair of shears like an artschool dropout trying to give herself bangs. Spent a full day harvesting until sundown, lugging away dozens and dozens of strange red fruit. Pomegranates are weird, like god and evolution chasing after each other, and I cant think of another way to explain it. Learned pretty quickly why the fuck pomegranate juice is so expensive. Juicing them is hella labor intensive. One fruit might take 20 minutes and yield about an inch of juice. My kitchen looked like a crime scene with dark red drops and castoff from the ceiling to floors, or perhaps more aptly, from the windows to the walls. satisfying process though.

had a big scare with my little lady after chola's tumor became infected. Within the span of a day it grew to twice the size and meanwhile she became unresponsive, not able to eat or drink, shaking intermittently throughout the day. It was heartbreaking and at one point I completely lost my composure, sobbing into my hands, overwhelmed with thoughts of the worst that could happen. It was the most emotion I've ejected in years, certainly out of my face. Luckily she pulled through that first day the infection took over and we were able to get her on a schedule of antibiotics and move her surgery day up, though she would have to be coned up in her dunce cap until then.

The day of the surgery came and she took it like a champ, bounding back almost immediately, though what weight she had lost was quickly put back on, since her round the clock medication meant untold amounts of ricotta to airplane it in. All told, across a single month I spend $3300 in medical bills and she gained a full kilo in medicinal cheese. ricotta stuffed pooch. every second i am smothering her with affection.

Because the surgery was rescheduled, I was able to attend Thanksgiving, resuming our new tradition of going to my brothers house in redacted. New this year was kevin hayes and his mom lili of pancake pie fame.
The next day, the next day, we went to TopDrawer where I would negotiate between every variation of the Kolo Tino in Limited Super Special Edition DUNE and ended up taking home the in-store demonstration model, not caring that it had been handled as it was the one I first fell in love with. You ever see that Disney Cartoon with the hats that fall in love? Johnny Fedora and Alice Blue Bonnet? There's something about that store that reminds me of the texture of that cartoon.
I had nowhere to put this, but I ordered a McRib and it was missing the bottom bread of the sandwich. So I had to eat it upside-down and open faced. It's unfortunate that the nature of my memory means i will probably remember this long after the other memories of this month's events have faded.

Humantooths Pomegranate Pointers
How to tell if a pomegranate is ready to pick:

You ever cup a grown man's balls? The pomegranate should be heavy and carry the weight of the branch in its ends.

the color should be rich and consistent as a simile

the shape should be a bit bulgy and angular

if its cracked a bit thats usually fine, but look inside for ants and stuff

if its really split, inspect it visually, keep or toss what you you want.

if there's a hole, especially with scarring around the skin, that's bad.
You dont want to leave these on the tree, they will attract pests and eventually rot

Sometimes they might pop off by hand, but this is rare. Youre gonna need heavy duty shears. Something that might double as a murder weapon

To split open the fruit:

make a deep cut, but dont go all the way through
wiggle the knife a bit side-to-side
shove your thumbs in the gash and pull it apart.
Is there funky stuff in the bottom thingy? half the time thats fine, after you split the fruit you'll usually find that the funky stuff doesnt make it into the fruit because the bottom part's all thicc
what i like to do is get a sharp knife and cut out that flowery bit deep into the meaty part thusly:

so that anything that was exposed to the outside gets cleaved off. if that funky stuff creeps in through the meaty bit, this is when you should chuck it
How to get rid of pomegranate stains from light colored clothing: you dont.
Fast Fact: Those little red corn kernel guys are called 'arils'

The first week of October was spent horizontally, in that I was bed bound and.. sick? I'm still not sure what happened there; American health care means I've conditioned myself to not visit the doctor under any circumstances. Luckily, I hardly fall ill, so it was an almost-amusing experience to observe. My head hurt too much to look at a screen and every time I stood up it was like peeling myself off the road after taking a semi-truck like that awful child in Pet Semetary.
I'm just hoping I'll be good by the 10 th because my brother, his wife and I had been looking forward to a semi-hinged stationery-centric weekend in LA. Not just any ole trip either- that weekend was slated for the first annual Bungu LA Expo aka BunguFest (not a sex thing). We had been wanting to go to the SF Pen Show to celebrate our mutual obsession, but life happened and circumstances wouldn't allow, so we were pretty stoked to see that there was going to be stationery expo geared towards Japanese brands in their backyard.

Mind you, online tickets for the first day had sold out, but we were hopeful we'd still be able to get in, since the site said they had still reserved a whole bunch of tickets for the door. Then, some fuck at the LA Times newspaper wrote a long ass piece about the event and the people planning it, bringing it way too much attention and now I understand why sometimes politicians execute target journalists. just kidding. We coulda gotten tickets for the second day but my con-going experience has taught me the coolest shit sells out day one- a real and present danger amplified by the fact that there would be many first-time vendors.
Board the Amtrak and catch a train to Glendale, Friday before BunguFest. Bungufest Eve, you might not say. We discuss our game plan. I'm thinking getting there a bit later in the day might be better, since by that time, the folks that showed up in the morning will be filtering out and damn if people in LA don't love lines (see: Pink's Hot Dogs). Jen volunteers to get up early and hold us a spot in line, but all of us are up bright and early the next morning anyway, so we decide to roll up when it opens. The expo is being held at beautiful Union Station (in that big side room at the entrance, for anyone who has ever been). The line felt infinite, wrapping around the station. We settled in and used the time to catch up, plot a menacing letter on adorable stationery to the aforementioned LA Times journo, and mentally drown in the ocean of keychain creatures clipped to all manner of totes, purses and bags.
We finally get in TWO AND A HALF HOURS later, and promptly treated to- more lines. The place was clearly at max capacity and certain sections, booths and features had built up their own queues. Didn't know when I walked in but I needed a lot of wooden stamps. An obscene amount of wooden stamps. Did you know that stamps can be combined to form entire scenes? I didn't, but after a stamping demonstration that felt like a magician's sleight of hand, I was sold. Without the supervision of people who wouldn't understand, I was allowed to purchase four notebooks I may never fill to join the other notebook I've never started**. One purchase I got on a whim, and turned out to be real pleased with, was a photo essay in the form of a book, exploring mom and pop stationery shops across Japan, compiled by one Mr. Allister Lee. It was lovely reading for the train ride home.
On the way out I spotted my friend Kevin (not the Hayes), which was cool. We were leaving at the same time, I asked him how long he had to wait to get in and he said ten minutes. Spotted him again when we pulled up to the second location, PaperPlant Co. The owners of the shop put the event on and here another line had formed. I couldn't, none of us could, so we strolled through LA's weird ass Chinatown and finally went home to flatten out. We ended up getting pizza and watching Lower Decks til we all got sleepy.

The next day was a tour of LA stationery stores. I felt like a delegate being shown the finest wares in the kingdom. Got some more things with a little more discretion. Caught a pen crush at Top Drawer. Wandered around a warehouse filled with decades of meticulous sculptures, tasteful hoarding and assemblages. Still not sure what that place was called but its next to a marionette theater and within walking distance to Shorthand.
The next week my neighbor's family, which has as many members as most people's extended families, came into town to reunite with their brother facing terminal illness. His place (my neighbor's) is a sty so when I heard he was going to be housing two grown adults in his already cramped one-bedroom, I offered my guest room immediately and without thought. I declined most of their offers to join them for outings, but the day before they left I finally did accept their offer to go to SDZINEFEST, where one can see what America's most mediocre city has to offer. I was still a bit high off the Bungu Expo and felt the need to spend big on small potatoes. Got a handful of things, which I haven't bothered to give a second look, but to be fair, the same can be said of most (if not all) of my most recent comiccon haul.
Lastly, and hopefully leastly, I had to bring my sweet Chola to the vet for a bump in her tummy tissue that kinda looks like a new boob- she was born with an asymmetrical amount of nipples, so she doesn't need another. Cost a pretty penny to run a gamut of tests and we have a surgery scheduled for the week of Thanksgiving. Luckily, she's as spry and sassy as ever, so it isn't bothering her in the meantime, and despite her getting on in years, I know her vim and vigor will pull her through. The last time she had surgery, for a minute there I didn't know just how we were going to afford it, but this time it feels good to be in a place where I can cover anything she needs.
She had a blast on Halloween, sitting outside on an outdoor blanket, handing out barks to trick-or-treaters and airplanes.

* 'bungu' means stationery in Japonaise
** hands up if you too have contemplated your own mortality through stationery

I must not have done much of much this month because flipping through my trusty Hibino, nothing seems to jump out besides celebrating my brother's birthday and bidding my folks farewell for their move to Seattle.
For my brother's birthday I made him a painting of celebrated director and all around handsome fella, David Lynch and a little SD card containing 500000000 years button full series (yt only has the first three episodes, which are still great, and the rest are on prime). Both subjects have been ongoing obsessions of mine for the past few months. And while I can't offer you a painting, I can offer you this ASCII portrait for you to print out at home (png version). A few months ago, I posted a link to the auction site for David Lynch's estate, a must-scroll for any fan of his. Even though it's long since closed, looking at some of his things brings me little hits of joy.
As for the other item on the docket, you heard that right, mama and papa tooth have moved on to the Pacific Northwest. My dad's been working for Amazon AWS and they recently ~~suggested~~ forced all their employees to return to office, then relocated a lot of them in what I believe was an effort to induce resignations rather than announce official lay-offs. But whatdoIknow? They seem to be enjoying it so far. They're super cute together still. For their last night in town, I took them out to their favorite cartel-coded restaurant, La Sinaloense.
My own work has been good and steady, made a lot of bucks this month which Im willing to convert to dumb shit delivered to my door. While much of said shit has, is, and always will be more stationery, I doubt any of it will be coming from ZARA's new line, which I bitched about thoroughly in my latest post to substack.
Next month there will be much more to report as there have already been travels and tribulations. Until then, EVERYONE, HAVE A GREAT DAY.

«8/25 Introduction»

Another fun, fat and funky, fruitful month for humantooth. First off thank you all for 500k page views, I still cant believe that they all aren't just me checking to see if my edits took. In a world where tiktok videos break 1m views in 24hrs, I dont take the slow climb to half of that in a few years for granted. Looking at my dumb little website is a genuine conscious effort as neocities doesn't have an algorithm or a to-go menu. To celebrate I got myself a new url, which I actually forgot about until flipping through my Hibino trying to remind myself what I did this month.

Visitor K

Got a visit from my very best friend Katrina, who drove out from New Mexico, so that was a delight. In preparation for her visit, and to meet the minimum for free shipping on Jet Pens, I ordered her a Masuya Monokaki, which I would come to find has a long and sordid history. Ok just a long history.

I knew the cover was sourced from an Edo period washi maker, and wanted to make note of the name studio because she likes that kind of stuff (i.e. paper-making; she's a bookbinder). Trying to find that name led me to many open tabs, google-translations and a whole entry in my stationery specific blog, stationeryspecific.substack.com.
As for her visit, it was quick, since I caught her on the tail end of a lower-state regional road trip, but we got to exchange gifts (she made me some LOVELY boxes to keep my magazines in using her bookbinding skills), chit and chat and do some tables and chairs business at whole foods like we did as kids, except this time we have money to pay for everything we ate.

Nesbitt Country News

There's this realtor in the neighborhood I live in who mails us these fliers and calendars to keep her present in our minds should any of us that own homes ever wish to sell, and often they will include a cartoon illustration of the neighborhood with the caption THIS IS NESBITT COUNTRY. So its become a bizarre running joke that we are all citizens of Nesbitt Country and she is our queen.
Every year the citizens of Nesbitt Country participate in a massive multi-family neighborhood garage sale (an MMFNG, if you will) and she drives around on her little golf cart bequeathing her subjects with Krispy Kreme donuts. It's hell.
These garage sales are pure mania. They start at seven (in the actual morning) and the second the garage comes up you dont get a chance to set up because immediately folks are walking up and asking how much this is? And the tide doesn't stop until about 10 or 11 but by that time it feels like three days have past and I can only liken it to time spent on shrooms or LSD.
This being our third year, and the previous year giving me PTSD where I was shouting out prices in my dreams, I was in the right mind to make the executive decision to not begin until 8am. While we did sell less, we made up for it in reducing stress. It was actually kind of fun. And I was able to offload art supplies and minis to 14 and 12 year old girls respectively that were thrilled beyond measure. So that felt good.
A couple weeks later I would learn how truly boring my house is when the power was shut off for scheduled something or other. It started before I could make coffee -which is when I learned that actually, my stove does need electricity to boil water- and was slated to end at 2:30pm but went past that until 4:00pm. I think I painted? and swatched some new inks? I certainly didn't read since I was able to make a mobile hot spot from my phone to stream true crime nonsense on my ipad.
Ive been struggling with reading lately, not like with putting together words into letters, but the act. Its a guilt I feel because I have so many freaking books and have added more since comiccon.

Inks of the month

Miscellany
We have also upgraded our hardware at HumanTooth farms. well, not sure if "upgraded" is the right word but I got a new tech thing. A stinking cute pink laptop I found on Amazon for $180USD. Took me awhile but I was able to turn it into a halfway decent machine once I terminated all these inane update processes that were constantly running and skull-fucking the CPU. I mostly got it to do L33t HaX0R shit with my M5 Cardputer and finally play HYLICS, neither of which I was able to do as a macOS girlie. Come to find that since the last time I made a foray into Michaelsoft Binbows, they've drummed up some decent ways to customize that awful awful interface.
and in Boone news, because I know none of y'all care, this month was absolutely BLESSED. For over a year now we have been looking forward to Boone v Boone, where Sarah would maker her argument for why she believed she was still entitled to $1,000 per month alimony payments while SEVRVING LIFE IN PRISON.
Since interest in the case has dwindled to loonies like me and it was pretty clear that media wasn't going to be there to record the way they did for her criminal case. A couple youtubers made their way down to florida to witness it in person and report back the exact degree how far off the rails she went. I, however, realized I had access to the feed since I had requested it back in May for the pretrial conference, and the links and dial-in details appeared to be used throughout the year (not on a case-by-case basis). I kept this to myself, figured out how to do screen recordings with audio on my computato, figured out how to record calls on my phone as back up (Thanks, Gemini!) and set my alarm on the morning of the trial and logged in through both. It. was. glorious. Not only was Sarah operating at peak craziness, her ex, once accommodating and kind, did a magical girl transformation into Sailor Grey Rock, delivering biting one-liners during cross examination. I was a bit nervous on getting it all since the trial was earmarked for three hours and ran closer to four, so you can imagine, these were MASSIVE files. After leaking the recordings to a few youtubers and getting shout-outs in turn, I went through and digitally glued them all together, removing any PII and name of the minor child and to the joy of the r/SarahBooneContinued subreddit, finally uploaded the whole kit and caboodle to the Internet Archive. Link below via the archive.org logo, along with links to my first ever font and a painting I did during the blackout.

. .

WHO IS HE?

*Spoils of July'25*
1. San Diego ComicCon Haul
- Click to explore
- Yes, I snuck in again. I packed in a few goodies into this year's haul post including some interviews and free online versions. I'm thinking of scanning in the vintage comics I snagged and uploading them to archive.org, since I was able to find one there.
Click here to see last year's haul.
2. FREE GUIDE
- yt-dlp-guide-intro.html
- Complete walkthrough on downloading videos from youtube (and thousands of other sites), for free, on a Mac, with subtitles embedded (as in the case of anime or foreign language videos where downloading the video file itself isn't enough) using command-line prompts
3. I became an Amazon Vine Reviewer
- You ever be looking at Amazon reviews and see "Product reviewed by Amazon Vine Customer" and wonder how these fools are getting free stuff from Amazon? now I am fools getting free stuff from Amazon! Im not sure what triggered it but I got an invitation and now I'm allotted up to three free things a day from a nega-Amazon portal full of crappy shit. Apparently you don't get the good stuff like electronics and shit until you reach Gold status, which requires 80 product reviews within a certain trial period and a few other metrics. At Gold there is no price cap on the products you can request, for regular shmegular Vine all the products are worth $100 or less. So far I've reviewed 35 items. The reason its a laugh now cry later situation is because its easy to forget that you might have to pay taxes on all the products they give you, even if they are free, ~~assuming youre the kind of person that reports your taxes consistently and honestly~~.
4. The SBU Library
- The obsession continues. Big month in the SarahBoone-iverse. Used my Orange County Court account to lead a completely unhinged 33-page PreTrial thing written by Sarah, which the subreddit tore to shreds and a bunch of people would go on to cover, earning me not one but two shout-outs from my favorite Boone-tent creator. Because I hosted the pdf on my neocities account, I thought I might as well share it explicitly, in case any of y'all were curious. I think if you keep in mind that it's meant to be an official court document, you will begin to understand why Sarah Boone has become a legal lolcow. You will also find one of her finest motions filed last year where she the status of her holiday greeting cards are put on the public record with inordinate rage.
Mind you, none of these have to do with her murder case. These are the on-going family court filings where she is trying to compel her ex-husband to continue with alimony* and child support payments ‡ while she is serves her life sentence.

LYING-motion.pdf originally handwritten, bold text is used to indicate when phrases were underlined more than once.
3pgs.

Pretrial
Compliance.pdf This is what happens when the worlds worst Karen gets sentenced to life in prison.
33pgs.

* which she calculates to be $67,000, to be paid in $300 installments for the next 18 years, even though it was set to expire in April of 2025
‡ yes. child support payments.
5. Dicking around with the M5 Cardputer

Having fun with this thirty-dollar doo-hickey and teaching myself Arduino programming in the process. Comes with an internet radio amongst other apps and a community of multi-hatted hackers making all manner of destructive tools for it. And of course it runs DOOM.

border img made with Broider.

humanTooth-type-v.1.ttf

After long last, I am thrilled to report I have been able to cross an item off my perpetual to-do list:
~~Make my own font~~.

Granted, I kind of used a cheat code to get there, but that doesn't negate the fact that this font did not exist before, and now it does. Yes, it's a little rough around the edges and hard to read, but so am I. In case you can't tell- it's meant to be a Display font, rather than used for body text.
I submitted it to Fontesk.com, a site where I have wasted many an hour gathering fonts for the second coming of Christ, and was so fucking jazzed to see that they accepted it! As of this writing it is currently sitting on their front page, which left me cheering in my chair.
If you would like to download it and use it yourself, I have given it Public Domain license, meaning its free to use for commercial, personal, and spiritual projects.

Downloads:
☞ Just the .ttf file, thanks.
→ FULL PACKAGE ←
(Includes: .otf, .ttf, .woff, .woff2, license)

AaBbCcDdEeFfGgHhIiJjKkLlMmNnOoPpQqRrSsTtUuVvXxYyZz!?0123456789:;[]{}\/~+=-_

LINK.DUMP #026 - digital anime, animation and anatomy archaeology, ancient math made modern, and standing on another planet while on earth. Plus some cool tools for neo-citizens.

JeJune
did you ever play JeJune?
aka the Jejune institute?
Its too much to explain but if you've ever seen the Jason
Segal show Dispatches from Elsewhere, its like that but
without the magical mary sue bitch.
I was lucky enough to have played a few rounds with my
brother or friends that came in from out of town, without
knowing what it was and would become.
I just thought it was one of those things that makes
san francisco "neat"
but now its gone and so is most else that supported that
same adjective.
but that was then and this is now,
so lets talk about last month.

This June was a pretty good one!
To no surprise most of my life unfolded online.
If you've ever happened upon my /now page*, you might have cottoned on to the fact
that i like to list the type of content im particularly keen on atm but one overarching content
category that has never left, is Sarah Boone-tent
*if you havent you would be forgiven as its hard to find and, like the little debbie ice cream line is neater in concept
than in practice
If you dont know who sarah boone is, here is the long and the short of it:

‣ Our Sarah, an alcoholic-in-denial, kills her boyfriend Jorge by zipping him in a suitcase and leaving him to suffocate.
‣ She finds him the next morning and calls 911 while clearly still hung over.
‣ The couple had shared a phone which she gladly gave over to detectives NOT REMEMBERING that she had
recorded video of herself taunting and torturing Jorge while he begged to be let out.
‣ Her interrogation was so manic, panicked, and full of narcissistic quips that it became an instant true crime classic.
~~ "I dont think you all understand who I am, I am an outstanding mother to my son, I'm a straight-A student*, I excel at everything."
‣ *She was 42 at the time
‣ After she was arrested she began running through court-appointed attorneys, who would withdraw
due to "irreconcilable differences", meaning, she was insufferable.
‣ As she's going through attorneys she's also writing long and absurd, unhinged handwritten letters to the judge about how dissatisfied she was
with her attorneys and eventually the judge himself, that read as "complaints to the manager" meets "highschool student trying to reach the word count".
‣ She writes a 58-page letter complaining about her EIGHTH attorney at which point the judge rules she has
waived her right to court appointed counsel through her behavior and has to represent herself.
‣ A lawyer would eventually come to represent her and regret doing so.
‣ The trial. The trial was a lot. For the state's rebuttal they just played videos from Sarah's phone and read out her texts. No witnesses called.
‣ Sarah gets sentenced to life in prison.
‣ What happened after that would take too long to type.

Needless to say there was always a ton of content coming out keeping folks updated on miss Sarah Boone.
Its how I was introduced to trial watch streams.

Parallel to her criminal case was a civil case between her and her ex-husband. Sarah had been living off of her $1,000 per month alimony and the $100 she got in child support payments since she was supposed to have her son for four days out of the week to her husband's 3 (this was hardly ever the case, as she was usually too drunk to pick him up). While Sarah was incarcerated she expected those payments to continue and be deposited into her commissary account so she could buy honeybuns and butterfingers. She was FURIOUS when her ex tried to adjust the terms of her alimony, we know this because she started writing letters to the judge of that case too.
Thing is, r/SarahBooneCase, hub for all things Boone on reddit, did not allow posts pertaining to the family court case once the criminal trial had ended. Which goes back to what I did this month. I started r/SarahBooneContinued. I found a good 500+ folks that are just as nosy as I am who have joined me in pouring over every bit of data dumb bitch Boone generates, through her jailhouse text messages, messed up motions and letters to the court. If you think nothing productive can come of this I would invite you to see my upcoming essay on Sarah Boone's Pro Se Motions and Universal Basic Income as proposed in Jared Lanier's Who Owns the Future.
And if I wasn't living in my computer enough, I also started a stationery specific substack as a vessel for my stationery related fixation. You can find that at https://stationeryspecific.substack.com
I only have two posts (one on the discontinued Pilot Multiball and the other rounding up niche industry-oriented stationery finds) and a technical third I used to promote over on r/fountainpens where I gave away a free stamp template with instructions on how to get it made.
The rest of the month was spent ordering junk on the internet, making gifts, and working towards a promotion at work so I can order even more junk on the internet. The vicious circle that never ends. Hakuna Matata. hasta mañana.

May was marked with new acquisitions, soft work and partial dedication. Meaning i bought a lot of shit online and did my job. You may have noticed that im in the habit of collecting colors this year. Idk if thats the right phrasing. it's what im wasting my money on. ink and paint. club. This month's standouts were shade-splitting handmade watercolors from Dusty Bee on Etsy and a range of draw-joppers from Kitty Ink Pot, the Orient's best kept secret. These inks are shifty and feel almost alive, changing color entirely depending on paper type [test]. Getting them to my room in [REDACTED] was a triumph of globalization as the only supplier i could find online was Soe & Soe in Australia. Shipping was twenty american bucks but I was riding one of those sad on myself for missing the family trip to Asia waves so I pressed the fuck-it button, aka 'PLACE ORDER'.

(Click to enlarge)
I have actually been using them too, you can see Rustic Copper, an almost impossible simultaneous navy and orange-red, in the ears of this Xolo I painted per Clark's request. Another treat I received as compensation for missing the trip was this glorious gift from my brother and his wife:
THE LIMITED EDITION HONGKONG MCDONALDS MAH JONG SET
Jen and I had discovered it on IG back in January when it was released, dismayed to find that it was going for hundreds of dollars. They had tasked one of our least favorite cousins with two baby mamas in Hong Kong to buy it on their version of mercari while he was out there and fly it back to Taiwan where they picked it up and brought back for me here in [REDACTED].
They also facetimed me from the PLOTTER store in Taipei which turned out to be better stocked than the flagship in Tokyo. We all geeked out together on their luxury paper goods. Brother's holy grail item is the whiteboard insert which had a brief and glorious existence at a pop-up event in possibly Chicago.
He would have to settle for a frankenstein solution, which would prompt me to lend my recently acquired whiteboard notebook and dry/wet erase marker & pen knowledge, distilled into the Whiteboard Report. My passion for paper and my penchant for sharing have inspired me to start a stationery specific substack, where I plan to sink many hours once i get past merely parking my preferred username.
Did you know you can order custom stamps? the ka-thunking self inking kind? for like, 10 bucks? Every night when I write down what I did, I like to make note of what pen/ink I'm using. I have a few mini stamps that look like pens and others that look like ink. I saw an Eric Small Things stamp that seemed perfectly catered to that purpose but come to find that it's sold out and $30 bucks when it wasn't. Also come to find that Eric Small Things is a demigod in the Japanese side of journal world.

Currently reading:

PS: Can you spot the possum? i pass it nearly every day I walk the dog, its been sitting in the sun mummifying for over a year. I took a pic with my little thermal camera.

Hover to reveal.

LYING-motion.pdf	originally handwritten, bold text is used to indicate when phrases were underlined more than once. 3pgs.
Pretrial Compliance.pdf	This is what happens when the worlds worst Karen gets sentenced to life in prison. 33pgs.